Ross Geller, one of the prominent characters from the show, Friends, is now facing a lot of criticism. People used to think of him as a “nice guy,” but now they see him as someone who can be manipulative and insecure. His actions are seen as promoting a sense of entitlement and harmful behaviors.
This view was made more popular by a video on Instagram from @wtfaleisa. The video got more than 54,728 likes since it was posted on September 3, 2024, as of when this article was written.
“Ross Geller is a manipulative, insecure, terrible man-baby that normalized incels.”
This feeling has been well-received by fans of Friends who are watching the show again.
“The term ‘nice guy’ was literally from Friends … about Ross.”
So why is Ross from Friends considered one of the worst characters on TV? Let us look at three main reasons.
How does Ross’s “nice guy” archetype reinforce harmful relationship dynamics
Ross embodies the “nice guy” stereotype, a man who believes his kindness and romantic feelings should earn him love and admiration, even when he makes mistakes. He demonstrates this attitude in his pursuit of Rachel.
He spent years longing for her but often sabotaged their relationship with jealousy and manipulation.
The biggest moment of this feeling of being owed something is when Rachel chooses to leave her dream job in Paris to be with Ross in the last episode of Friends.
Ross refusing to go to Paris with her shows that he is not willing to make sacrifices for their relationship. His behavior seems to support the idea that women should prioritize men’s needs over their own goals, which is strongly criticized in today’s society.
“We were on a break” was a laughable version of Ross’s failure to take accountability
The famous “we were on a break” argument shows how Ross often tries to avoid taking responsibility. After a fight with Rachel, Ross sleeps with another woman and defends his actions by claiming they were already broken up.
This way of refusing to accept his emotional impact continues his habit of avoiding responsibility. It happens in all his other relationships too. When he accidentally calls Emily “Rachel” at their wedding and expects her to forgive him. Some people think these situations give the wrong ideas about relationships.
By showing that Ross’s actions are acceptable because he loves Rachel, the show makes unhealthy behavior seem normal, and suggests that just being sincere is enough to make up for bad actions.
Ross’s deafening lack of character growth on Friends
Unlike other characters, Ross doesn’t change much during the 10 years of the show. While Chandler goes through a big change, from being someone with commitment problems to a supportive partner, Ross stays practically the same. His feelings of not being good enough, thinking he deserves special treatment, and focusing only on himself keep happening, and nothing changes.
For instance, Ross treated Emily badly during their marriage. When he accidentally says Rachel’s name at their wedding, he puts it all on Emily to fix their relationship by asking her to never let him see Rachel again. Fans may have seen it as Emily being unreasonable at the time, but now, not so much. This shows he doesn’t want to take responsibility for his actions.
Instead, Ross’s character arc is finished without any change in his character, which makes viewers upset. People are starting to dislike Ross Geller more because of opinions shared on social media and in conversations about pop culture.
