The U.S. version of The Office is undoubtedly one of the most beloved comedy shows of all time. Over nine seasons, audiences spent time and fell in love with the eccentric crew at Dunder Mifflin Paper Company. From the well-meaning but cringe-worthy boss Michael Scott (Steve Carell) to the calculated yet gullible Dwight Schrute (Rainn Wilson), the series features an array of hilarious characters and funny moments.
The writing and humor in The Office is one of the reasons it remains so rewatchable, with particular focus on its clever dialogue. Many memorable quotes are said throughout the series, and it is difficult to narrow it down to the best. However, certain phrases and lines from the show are permanently lodged in fans’ minds.
10. “Today, smoking is going to save lives.”
“Stress Relief” – Season 5, Episode 14 (2009)
One of the most popular episodes among fans of The Office is “Stress Relief”, and this is largely due to its hilariously chaotic cold open. After nobody listens to his fire safety seminar, Dwight gets revenge on the office and stages a fire. Sealing all the exits shut, heating up doorknobs and cutting the phone lines, Dwight creates an all-too real simulation, finally throwing a cigarette into the trash can and proudly proclaiming “Today, smoking is going to save lives”.
His test doesn’t quite go to plan, however, as his co-workers panic and flee for their lives, and Stanley Hudson (Leslie David Baker) has a heart attack from all the commotion. While Dwight obviously had the right intentions despite his unconventional approach, it is unlikely that anybody got anything useful out of the situation.
9. “The worst thing about prison was the dementors.”
“The Convict” – Season 3, Episode 9 (2006)
Michael Scott has a number of alter-egos that appear throughout the series, including Date Mike, Michael Scarn, and of course, Prison Mike. Prison Mike is born when Michael learns that new Dunder Mifflin employee Martin Nash (Wayne Wilderson) has a criminal record. When Martin convinces the office that prison life is better than working in the office, Michael is determined to change their minds, and Prison Mike appears.
Sporting a purple bandanna and hardened exterior, Prison Mike explains the horrors of incarceration, revealing that “The worst thing about prison was the dementors”. A reference to the fictional creatures that guard Azkaban Prison in the Harry Potter series, he goes on to explain how scary the dementors were. Potter fans will get a huge kick out of the line, which highlights just how unprofessional Michael is as a boss, and makes for one of his craziest moments.
8. “I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious.”
“Fun Run” – Season 4, Episode 1 (2007)
There is always something abnormal going on at Dunder Mifflin, but a spell of bad luck seems to fall upon the office in season four’s “Fun Run”. After hitting Meredith Palmer (Kate Flannery) with his car, the death of Angela Martin’s (Angela Kinsey) cat Sprinkles and a virus on Pam Beesly’s (Jenna Fischer) computer, Michael is convinced that his workplace is cursed.
In order to cleanse the office, he organizes a Fun Run. Michael later says “I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious”. Although ‘stitious’ is definitely not a word in the English language, viewers can gauge that Michael perhaps has some belief in the supernatural – but only a little. Carell’s embodiment of the character and perfectly serious delivery totally sells the line, as only Carrell could do.
7. “I just want to lie on the beach and eat hot dogs. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
“Beach Games” – Season 3, Episode 22 (2007)
The Office is full of hilarious supporting characters, one of the most beloved being Kevin Malone (Brian Baumgartner). A member of the accounting department, Kevin isn’t the brightest bulb in the office, but has a heart of gold and an endearing personality.
One of his most relatable lines is featured in the episode “Beach Days”, which sees Michael put his employees in Survivor -like scenarios to see who is worthy of replacing him if he gets a new position in the corporate department. One of those activities is a hot dog eating competition, prompting Kevin to say “I just want to lie on the beach and eat hot dogs. That’s all I’ve ever wanted”. Who wouldn’t want to just lie on the beach and eat hot dogs? Sounds like the dream life.
6. “Yeah, I have a lot of questions. Number one, how dare you!”
“Night Out” – Season 4, Episode 15 (2008)
There’s no doubt that Kelly Kapoor (Mindy Kaling) is an icon. Overly dramatic about anything, she’s never afraid to speak her mind and be absolutely ‘extra’ about everything. One of the most hilarious components of the show is her on-and-off again relationship with Ryan Howard (B.J. Novak), which is messy and toxic in every way possible. After being promoted to Vice President of Sales, Ryan’s success gets to his head and ego.
When he returns to his old office, his employees are fed up with his new website, and Kelly is noticeably complaining. When Ryan asks if she has a question, she says “Yeah, I have a lot of questions. Number one, how dare you!” Both a jab at Ryan and the way he has treated her, Kelly’s outburst remains iconic.
5. “Identity theft is not a joke, Jim! Millions of families suffer every year.”
“Product Recall” – Season 3, Episode 21 (2007)
Jim Halpert (John Krasinski) plays many famous pranks on co-worker Dwight throughout the series, with some more extreme than others. Whether it’s putting Dwight’s stapler in jello or convincing him that it’s Friday instead of Thursday, their rivalry is unmatched. One of Jim’s most memorable pranks takes place in the cold open of “Product Recall’, where he shows up to the office dressed up as Dwight and mimics his mannerisms.
When Dwight realizes what is going on and is finally let in on the joke, he doesn’t find it funny. Dwight exclaims “Identity theft is not a joke, Jim! Millions of families suffer every year”. This doesn’t phase Jim, and he manages to stay in character, still unflustered by Dwight’s outburst. While this isn’t quite identity theft, Dwight does have a point – identity theft certainly isn’t a joke.
4. “I feel like all my kids grew up, and then they married each other. It’s every parent’s dream.”
“Finale” – Season 9, Episode 23 (2013)
The Office has one of the most emotional and satisfying TV finales of all time, which is rare for such a popular and long-running show. In the final episode, Dwight is getting ready to marry Angela, when Jim tells him he can no longer be his best man. Jim then presents him with Michael in a surprise appearance, as he left the series at the end of season seven.
It was a delight for fans to see Michael again, as his presence had sorely been missed and arguably led to a decline in the quality of the show. At the wedding, Michael proudly looks on at Dwight, Angela, Jim and Pam, saying “I feel like all my kids grew up, and then they married each other. It’s every parent’s dream”. While that perhaps didn’t come out the way Michael intended, the sentiment behind it is nevertheless sweet.
3. “I wish there was a way to know you’re in the good old days before you’ve actually left them.”
“Finale” – Season 9, Episode 23 (2013)
One of the most profound quotes in the entirety of The Office is in the finale and comes from employee Andy Bernard (Ed Helms), who both annoyed and entertained fans throughout the show’s run. By the end of season nine, Andy has left Dunder Mifflin and now has a job at his beloved Cornell University.
Upon reflecting on his time at Dunder Mifflin and how much he misses everybody, he says solemnly to the camera “I wish there was a way to know you’re in the good old days before you’ve actually left them.” It is a quote that hits hard, and is also quite surprising coming from Andy of all characters. Many of us wish we could revisit the good old days, or that we knew at the time how precious they were.
2. “Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.”
“The Fight” – Season 2, Episode 6 (2005)
Michael Scott is a fascinating character with a desperate need for acceptance, and will humiliate himself in the most cringe-worthy way to earn it. In season two of The Office, Michael and Dwight have a karate match during lunch to decide who is the superior fighter, as the whole office watches on. Michael emerges as the winner, leaving him feeling tough and victorious.
When asked if he would rather be feared or loved? “Easy”, he says, “Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.” It’s a bizarre and genius line that perfectly sums up Michael to a tee, and is one of the character’s most famous quotes among viewers. They, too, may be afraid of how much they love him.
1. “That’s what she said.”
“Sexual Harassment” – Season 2, Episode 2 (2005)
“That’s what she said” is Michael Scott’s signature phrase in The Office. The recurring line is said by him over forty times in the series, the first being in season two’s “Sexual Harassment” in front of the entire office and his own supervisor Jan Levinson (Melora Hardin).
Michael drops the overtly sexual line any chance he can get, whether it’s after “I can’t believe you came” or “and you were directly under her the entire time?”. He also doesn’t care who he says it in front of, whether it’s his employees or upper management at Dunder Mifflin. If the opportunity is there, he takes it. The line often gets Michael into trouble, but that doesn’t stop him from using it time and time again.
